Suburban Running

My excuse for not having run or written for the past two weeks is because I was moving. Most of my time was (supposed to be) taken up by packing and cleaning.

I took my first run in my new area today, a suburban part of Ottawa. It was quite a nice run, an slow and easy 3k around the block. I started up one road, and saw a cross street and thought, "Hey, doesn't that loop around?"

Jumping on to that street, I saw a number of other walkers, some lovely houses (I admit, I'm window-house hunting, where you see a house you like and admire, but don't go in to purchase), and after the turn back, I came across... a barn! There's a red barn and a little farmhouse right in the middle of suburbia!

I want to go knock on the owners' door one day and say, "Good on you, keeping this land and your barn!" I'm sure they were under a lot of pressure to sell. The barn looks like it's in reasonably good shape, but I didn't smell any animals. We don't want to offend the delicate sensibilities of suburbanites, now, do we?

In other news, the shoes were still working great, and my knees, though stiff, were responding well by the end of the trek.

First Steps (take two? three?)

A short update: I did my run, and the shoes went fine. Even though I was running on a treadmill, it was nice to be doing it. I could definitely feel the time off, though - my right knee felt pretty stiff compared to the left one.

I did 1.2miles (which is close to 2km) at a slow pace, and didn't really need to stop once. It wasn't until I finished the run that I realized I hadn't changed the incline at all, so my work out was a lot easier than outdoor running.

Even so, I'm feeling pretty tired.

Sadly, that's all the update for today.

Breaking Back into the Game

In a conversation with my cousin tonight, I called myself fat.

I looked at my statement, the bold black-on-white comment in the chat window, and I felt like I'd slapped myself.

I'm not 'fat'. Sure, I may carry 10 pounds more than I want to, the Body Mass Index may say I'm unhealthily overweight, and I may not fit into my jeans as well, but I'm not fat.

And here, I'm going to contradict myself, even as I try to clarify. I think that 'fat', as I used it, is an unfortunate, insulting term that hurts feelings and should be spurned. And I know this and embrace it, so I wondered why I would say something like that.

So I thought about that, even as my cousin said, "Uh, what the hell are you talking about?" and I decided that how I'm really feeling is angry with myself.

I'm angry with myself because I have been lazy and gluttonous the past six months. I have done nothing that I wanted to do, six months ago: to keep running, to keep eating healthy, to join a gym and work on my cardio and musculature. I'm not living up to the promises I made myself. And that makes me angry with me.

Six months later, I am at the end of my tether. I woke up depressed, and thought this is not the way to keep going.

So, as Paolo Nutini sang, I got a pair of new shoes. And tomorrow, I'm going to run 2km. Baby steps, but more than none. I'm going to go back to six months ago, and keep that promise, and get working on it again.

I'm tired of being angry with myself. I want to love myself again.

Excuses, Excuses

I have decided, five months after my victorious half marathon, that I am great at excuses.

I am good at the big excuses: I shouldn't run because I just had eye surgery, or I just finished a race (okay, the first is a reason, but I still didn't run, so it qualifies).

I am good at the little excuses: I'm tired, my apartment is warm and it's cold out there, I didn't eat right, I have to eat first, I'm busy and can't fit it in.

All sorts of little excuses that pile up into big lay-overs between races and getting fit for races. Now I should direct my attention and willpower (as little of it as there is sometimes) to overcoming these excuses.

It's hard to make excuses when I take my running gear to work. That helps because it's going to be the same length of time as the bus, I enjoy the scenery more, and I'm getting fit at the same time. Go me!
Now that I'm moving further away from work, I'm going to have to find new ways to avoid the usual excuses and 'reasons'.

What excuses have you come up with, or how have you overcome them?

Victory is 2:28. So Far

I done it.

I done it ten minutes faster than last time.

To drop the (wherever) accent, I did the race weekend half-marathon in two hours and twenty eight minutes. Let me tell you, nothing is sweeter than thinking you'll never make it to the end line, finding the one thing in your head that will keep you going, and beating your realistic deadline.

As usual, here is what I learned from this race:
1. Run your own race. Don't run it with anyone. I started running the race with three wonderful running buddies from the running room. However, during the first half of the race, I had to depart their company and do my own thing. Why? Because I was achin'. They had done all the work deserving of a 2:15 finish, while I had already admitted that I did not. After 10k, I stopped playing catch-up, and was able to win on my own terms.

2. Find one thought that will keep you going. At around 7km, I struggled and panted and wasn't sure I'd even finish in 2:30, or at all, from how my knee was starting to ache. I reached deep, and thought of one thing past this race to strive for: Army. I had my army bracelet to touch and fondle, and that really kept me thinking that, if I didn't finish this, I couldn't reach far enough in me to even try the army. That, and my boyfriend: What would he think if I fell out half-way through? (realistically, I'm sure he'd know I stopped for good reasons, but my knee was the only thing hurting at that point, and I had tylenol on me)

3. Tylenol, despite what anyone else may say, is your friend while you're running a race like that. Take it with you.

4. No matter how dead you are, how dragging-the-feet you feel, you have enough for the end. Ever since about 8k to the end, I had been picking up my pace - swinging my arms faster, thinking of the sweet beer reward, making smaller goals of getting past the 2:30 bunny, all these tactics played a part in my getting ahead of my previous time. Even when I was dragging my butt at 3km out, I would still pick up my knees and keep moving. I made a conscious decision to save myself between 300m and 100m out, but when I saw that end line, and the time counting down, I decided I would not be ending anywhere after the strike of 2:30, and picked up my aching knees and thighs again to make it in. I may have felt like collapsing after I crossed the line, but damn if it didn't add to the euphoria of finishing before my deadline.

5. Again: have people at the endline. It doesn't even matter who, anymore. Even if your friends are waiting for you outside the running area, look for a familiar face. It's well worth hearing their own endtimes and tribulations and sharing your own.

6. Do the work: For all that I'm patting myself on the back, and knowing I was busy, I know my time would have been better if I'd done more of the work.

That's all for now... If I can think of more, I will add them in.

Gearing Up for the Second Half-Marathon

The heat is oppressive in Ottawa this week, with humidexes (humidexi?) of around 40C and not much relief in sight. This has a lot of runners on pins and needles because this coming weekend is the event we've been training for, the Ottawa Race Weekend. Running in the heat is little fun, but running the race in the heat is worse - we have to take extra precautions to not let ourselves get heat stroke, and we don't want to just call it off and go home like we could with another run.

I am excited to pick up my race kit tonight. I have a list of the other things I need: tylenol, for when my knees want to give out, GU gels for replenishing energy, energy beans cuz they're yummy, and water and gatorade. Maybe I'll redo my music playlist as well.

I'm trying to go through my last race experiences and remember what worked and what didn't: bring water, run the whole race course two weeks before (doing this really calmed my nerves about the hilly Gatineau portion), and hydrate before the run. Have fun, be proud of yourself, and reward yourself afterwards!

Despite recent upheavals at work, I will be taking the following Monday off, and I do plan to spend it in a cold bath.

In other news, the morning thing hasn't worked out as well as I'd hoped - I still like sleeping in. However, I have discovered that running home has psychological interest as well - I'm 'running away from work' as well as getting my work-out done so I can rest easily.
Take that, brain!

Morning Running

I hesitate to write about this, because whenever I start writing about running, I tend to stop both running and writing.

I have had trouble recently having the energy and willpower to get out and running. When I get home from work, I have only enough energy to stumble to my couch, lie down, and stare at MST3K for at least an hour. This leads to being hungry, hungry leads to eating, eating leads to not wanting to go out and run... It's a vicious, lazy cycle.

However, I am having trouble sleeping in past 5am, because the sun is coming up and my curtains let in a lot of light. Usually, this leads to me rolling over, burying my head under blankets, and thinking, "Please oh please, just another hour."

Today, I capitalized on the situation, and rousted myself at 5am to go run. I had thought I would be starving or my muscles would be tight, or I would lose interest and head home.

Getting out was a bit cool at 4C, but once I started running, it was just fine. I was dressed almost too warmly, but in the end, a long-sleeve shirt, my running coat, and winter running pants were perfect.

Man, I can't tell you how lovely it was to be out there in the relative quiet, running beside the Ottawa river, listening to the sound of the birds greeting the morning, and watching the sun lighten the sky gently. There weren't many other runners out and I didn't have my music, but the scenery kept my attention well enough for 5km.

On the downside, my left calf started to cramp partway and my right Achilles tendon was stiff, so perhaps more stretching is needed, or it might just be how it goes when you get up and go straight to running.

I think I'd like to do more of this.

In other news, I think I recognize a paralympian on TV as someone who lives in my building. Squee!